- Fighting about everything.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, do not make
everything an argument. Think about all of the
problems you have with your partner and really
consider whether these are deal breakers or if you
can build a bridge and get over them.
- Trying to change the other person.
In relationships, we need to realize we are unique
individuals. Often we are drawn to someone who is
completely opposite to us and after a while we can
be tempted to try to change them to be the same as
- Take a step back and remember why you fell in
love with this person in the first place. My
boyfriend is for the most part carefree and funny,
but sometimes his jokes start to drive me nuts or I
wish he was more organized. I have to remember
that I love that he can make me laugh and that he
has such a positive outlook on life.
- Keeping secrets from your loved one.
This is something that goes along with keeping
communication open—do not keep secrets. Not that
you have to tell the other person every minute detail
about your life, but you should not intentionally
keep something major from them. You know it is a
secret that needs to be shared when you feel even
slightly guilty for not telling them. It will come out
eventually and sooner is always better than later.
- Not taking time for yourself and being too co-
If you spend every waking moment with your
significant other, you will ultimately lose who you
are as an individual. Things like going to the store
on your own will be hard and you will find yourself
consulting that person for every small decision you
make. Take some time to do what you love. Have
your own hobbies, interests and friends. You will
both benefit from this and have a richer life as a result.
- Not talking about money.
Money is always a tricky subject. You might have
come from different backgrounds. If one person
grew up wanting for nothing and the other has
always had to pinch pennies, there may be some
disagreements over how money is spent. If you are
in a serious relationship, even if you have separate
money, be sure to discuss these things as money
issues are guaranteed to come up eventually.
- Avoiding confrontation.
Fighting is not the way most of us want to spend
our time, so it can be tempting to just brush all of
the problems under the rug. The flaw with that plan
is that the problems collect and multiply. This will
ultimately end up in an explosive argument, or a
parting of ways with the other person baffled as to
what went wrong. Communication is huge in any
relationship and should not be avoided.
- Trying to control our significant other.
Many of us either have control issues or things that
the other person does that drive us crazy. Both of
these scenarios can lead to us wanting to control or
comment on every move the other person makes.
Think about it though, would you like someone
telling you what to do every waking minute? You
are not this person’s parent. If he/she is a grown
adult, treat them like one.
- Expecting perfection.
We are all human. We all make mistakes. Do not
hold your significant other to some unrealistically
high expectation. This is especially hard for those of
us who hold unrealistically high expectations for
ourselves, but that’s another topic altogether.
- Forgetting to appreciate your partner.
never forget to tell your significant other,
“thank you” or “I love you.” At the beginning of the
relationship you surely noticed all of the kind things
that he/she was doing for you and praised him/her
accordingly. You said you loved each other all of the
time. Sometimes we forget how awesome the other
person is until we think about it. Tell your
significant other right now how you feel about them!
- Losing the romance in the relationship is one
of the key reasons why relationships fail.
It is easy to become complacent and slack on
making an effort for romance. The truth is,
relationships are work. Not that you won’t have any
fun along the way, but you need to remember it
takes a focused effort to be romantic with your